The Lord Is...

 I was the keynote speaker for a Christian camp, but I don't remember what I spoke about that week. What I remember was what someone in attendance shared with me. 

She had come to camp with her adult disabled daughter who needed constant care. She was from a well-respected family in the Christian community, but her world had begun to unravel. Her husband had recently left her for someone he had met online. The woman who had been her daughter's caregiver was dying. The landscape of her life had completely changed.

I can still see her standing in front of me as I prepared to speak that morning. She asked if she could share her thoughts with me. In a quiet and peaceful voice, she told me that during this turbulent time in her life that she continually meditated on Psalm 23. She told me that she had found rest for her soul meditating on the first three words of the Psalm, "The Lord is..."  

During my own times of desperation, I have experienced the peace that this reality brings. It reminds me of what God told Moses to tell the people who were enslaved in Egypt. He said to tell Israel that, "I AM has sent you."(Exodus 3:14) The children of Israel were set free from Egypt so that they could learn to worship in the wilderness. It's in the wilderness that we discover the Lord who is the great I AM.

"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore, we will not fear though the earth gives way, though the mountains be moved into the heart of the sea, though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains tremble at its swelling. Selah" (Psalm 46:1-3) Many Bible students believe that selah was a musical term that that meant to "pause" or "contemplate". When the flow of life is interrupted with harsh realities, we are invited to encounter the Lord who is...

Discovering Grace

 Love doesn't envy.

I was reminded of this Bible verse while sitting with my grandson at his cousin's birthday party. Almost every time a gift was opened, he would honestly express his jealousy. I respect how his parents have taught him to own his emotions. Sitting with him I was remined of how I was tormented by envy as a child.

I was eleven years old and spending the winter with my grandmother. I shared my grandmother with my four brothers and four sisters so getting to have individual time with her was very special. However, during this time she only had one thing on her mind, and it wasn't me. Grandmother was looking forward to meeting her two grandchildren, Margaret and Brian, who had been born on the mission field in Brazil.

I was miserable. I didn't want to be jealous, but I was.  I tried to be excited but all I felt was the torturous envy, so I prayed. It was a simple prayer, "Jesus, I want to love my cousins, but I don't know how. Please help me." God answered my prayer and did for me what I was unable to do for myself.

I learned so many things from that experience. God is love. Love doesn't envy. Confession means to say the same thing about something that God says. When God does for you what you can't do for yourself it's called grace. When God graciously answered my prayer and gave me love for my cousins, He also gave me peace. 

I want to share this memory of grace and peace and love with my grandson. I believe that our honest struggles can become the very places where we encounter God.