I could hear the passion in his voice the morning he greeted me with, "Mom, listen to this," I watched as my son closed his eyes and then stood before me and spoke with a clarion voice the words of Henry Wadsworth Longfellow's poem Excelsior. The poem is about a young man who bears a banner upon which is the word,"Excelsior," (translated from Latin "ever higher.")
Every evening before my son would go to bed I would place my hands on his head and pray a blessing over him. Before he left home I lay my hands on his head once more and prayed a special prayer for him. I prayed that he would spread his wings and let the breath of God take him as high and as far as the Spirit chose. I prayed this prayer to God but I wanted to whisper in my son's ear Excelsior.
Recently my son called me, he was calling to encourage me to expand my vision. "Mom,' he said, 'people need hope. You have something to say." I heard in his words an echo of the prayer I prayed for him so many years ago. "Spread your wings and let the breath of God take you as high and as far as the Spirit may choose." It's funny how I could so fully believe that God would do that for my son and yet I've never fully believed it could be true for me.
On my birthday this year before I was fully awake I heard the words, "Excel still more!" I heard these words again and again as I slowly came into consciousness. I went outside and took my seat and watched as darkness gave way to the light. I let the Spirit bathe my mind with truth. "Excel still more!" "Excel still more!" Excelsior!
Again the next morning I was awakened with the same clarion call to, "Excel still more!" I know the voice of the one wakes me with this exhortation. These are the same words spoken to the Thessalonians when they were told about how to live to please God. And so in response I humble my heart and spread my wings and ask the Spirit of the living God to take me ever higher, onward and upward to do His will.
Monday, March 23, 2015
Thursday, March 19, 2015
Double Vision
I have been experiencing double vision. Double vision is when there is a simultaneous perception of two images of a single object. I have had it happen twice lately - once when I was reading about Jesus standing before the high priest and then it happened again when I was reading about Jesus standing before Pontius Pilot.
I read in Mark 14:60-62, "Then the high priest stood up before them all and questioned Jesus, 'Don't you have an answer to what these men are testifying against you?' But he kept silent and did not answer anything. Again the high priest questioned him, 'Are you the Messiah, the Son of the Blessed One?' 'I am,' said Jesus, 'and all of you will see the Son of Man seated at the right hand of the Power and coming with the clouds.'" While I read these words I simultaneously had a perception of another image.
This was the other image that came to my mind as I read about Jesus before the high priest. Daniel 7:13-14, " I saw in the night visions, and behold, with the clouds of heaven there came one like a son of man, and he came to the Ancient of Days and was presented before Him." I wonder if the high priest perceived the same thing I did? I wonder if that is why he responded to what Jesus said by tearing his robes and saying that no more witnesses were necessary because Jesus had blasphemed. Surely he knew the prophecy of Daniel and that when Jesus said that they would all see by the Son of man seated at the right hand of the Power and coming with the clouds he was also saying that he was the fulfillment of that prophecy.
The second time I experienced this double vision was when I read the account of Jesus standing before Pontius Pilot. Jesus stood bruised and bloody before Pilot and Pilot asked him if he was the king in of Jews. "Jesus replied, 'My kingdom is not from this world. If my kingdom were from this world, my servants would fight to prevent me being handed over to Jewish authorities. But now my kingdom is not from here.' Then Pilate said, 'So you are a king!' Jesus replied, 'You say that I am a king. I have been born and have come into the world for this reason-- to testify to the truth. Everyone who belongs to the truth listens to my voice.'" (John 18:37) While I read these words I simultaneously had a perception of another image.
I no longer saw Jesus standing before Pontius Pilot instead, "As I looked, thrones were placed, and the Ancient of Days took his seat; his clothing was white as snow, and the hair of his head like pure wool; his throne was fiery flames; its wheels were burning fire. A stream of fire issued and came out from before him, a thousand thousands severed him; the court sat in judgment, and the books were opened."(Daniel 7:9,10) I wonder if Jesus contrasted his standing before Pitious Pilot and his standing before the Ancient of Days?
Jesus told Pilot the truth when he said that he was a king. In Daniel we see that when the Son of Man was presented to the Ancient of Days, "to him was given dominion and glory and a kingdom, that all peoples, nations, and languages should serve him: his dominion is an everlasting dominion, which shall not pass away, and his kingdom one that shall not be destroyed." (Daniel 7:14) Jesus also told Pilot that everyone who belongs to the truth listens to his voice. How did Pilot respond?
Pilot responded to Jesus by asking, "What is truth?" I think that Pilot's problem was not only that he didn't know what truth was. I think he also was suffering from myopic vision. He didn't perceive who was standing before him. What he needed was double vision.
I read in Mark 14:60-62, "Then the high priest stood up before them all and questioned Jesus, 'Don't you have an answer to what these men are testifying against you?' But he kept silent and did not answer anything. Again the high priest questioned him, 'Are you the Messiah, the Son of the Blessed One?' 'I am,' said Jesus, 'and all of you will see the Son of Man seated at the right hand of the Power and coming with the clouds.'" While I read these words I simultaneously had a perception of another image.
This was the other image that came to my mind as I read about Jesus before the high priest. Daniel 7:13-14, " I saw in the night visions, and behold, with the clouds of heaven there came one like a son of man, and he came to the Ancient of Days and was presented before Him." I wonder if the high priest perceived the same thing I did? I wonder if that is why he responded to what Jesus said by tearing his robes and saying that no more witnesses were necessary because Jesus had blasphemed. Surely he knew the prophecy of Daniel and that when Jesus said that they would all see by the Son of man seated at the right hand of the Power and coming with the clouds he was also saying that he was the fulfillment of that prophecy.
The second time I experienced this double vision was when I read the account of Jesus standing before Pontius Pilot. Jesus stood bruised and bloody before Pilot and Pilot asked him if he was the king in of Jews. "Jesus replied, 'My kingdom is not from this world. If my kingdom were from this world, my servants would fight to prevent me being handed over to Jewish authorities. But now my kingdom is not from here.' Then Pilate said, 'So you are a king!' Jesus replied, 'You say that I am a king. I have been born and have come into the world for this reason-- to testify to the truth. Everyone who belongs to the truth listens to my voice.'" (John 18:37) While I read these words I simultaneously had a perception of another image.
I no longer saw Jesus standing before Pontius Pilot instead, "As I looked, thrones were placed, and the Ancient of Days took his seat; his clothing was white as snow, and the hair of his head like pure wool; his throne was fiery flames; its wheels were burning fire. A stream of fire issued and came out from before him, a thousand thousands severed him; the court sat in judgment, and the books were opened."(Daniel 7:9,10) I wonder if Jesus contrasted his standing before Pitious Pilot and his standing before the Ancient of Days?
Jesus told Pilot the truth when he said that he was a king. In Daniel we see that when the Son of Man was presented to the Ancient of Days, "to him was given dominion and glory and a kingdom, that all peoples, nations, and languages should serve him: his dominion is an everlasting dominion, which shall not pass away, and his kingdom one that shall not be destroyed." (Daniel 7:14) Jesus also told Pilot that everyone who belongs to the truth listens to his voice. How did Pilot respond?
Pilot responded to Jesus by asking, "What is truth?" I think that Pilot's problem was not only that he didn't know what truth was. I think he also was suffering from myopic vision. He didn't perceive who was standing before him. What he needed was double vision.
Wednesday, March 18, 2015
Holding On
My friends and I were having lunch together yesterday and Susan shared a story with us. She told about the fear experienced by children who had been rescued from concentration camps. These children had known true hunger and although after they had been set free from their imprisonment, they were not free from their fear of starvation. Those who were caring for them discovered that if they gave the children a piece of bread to hold during the night, the children would be able to sleep. They were able to sleep because holding onto that bread they had the promise of something to eat in the morning.
Although I have never known the fear of starvation, I have known other fears. The children were given something to hold onto that reassured them that in the morning they would be provided for. When I go to bed at night I can see hanging on my wall something that gives me that same assurance. I look up and see these words, "You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you." (Isaiah 26:3)
There is something about going to sleep at night that invites the fears that can be suppressed during the busyness of the day to surface. There is an awareness of vulnerability that comes with the night. For the children who had known hunger holding bread was like holding onto a promise of provision. When I am faced with the knowledge of my vulnerability I reach out and take hold of the promise I find in the words of the Isaiah.
When the worries of life awaken me I have made it a practice to never use those fears as the theme of my prayers. I want my thoughts fixed on God and not on my problems so in the night I open the eyes of my spirit and I look at the one in whom I've put my trust. I remind myself of his promises and how he has given himself as provision for all my needs.
I have heard that peace is the calm assurance that God is in control. It is this same God who comes to me in the night season when I fix my mind on him. Like the child who has known hunger sleeps peacefully holding the bread, I find rest for my soul holding onto the promises of the one who gave himself to me as the bread of life.
Although I have never known the fear of starvation, I have known other fears. The children were given something to hold onto that reassured them that in the morning they would be provided for. When I go to bed at night I can see hanging on my wall something that gives me that same assurance. I look up and see these words, "You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you." (Isaiah 26:3)
There is something about going to sleep at night that invites the fears that can be suppressed during the busyness of the day to surface. There is an awareness of vulnerability that comes with the night. For the children who had known hunger holding bread was like holding onto a promise of provision. When I am faced with the knowledge of my vulnerability I reach out and take hold of the promise I find in the words of the Isaiah.
When the worries of life awaken me I have made it a practice to never use those fears as the theme of my prayers. I want my thoughts fixed on God and not on my problems so in the night I open the eyes of my spirit and I look at the one in whom I've put my trust. I remind myself of his promises and how he has given himself as provision for all my needs.
I have heard that peace is the calm assurance that God is in control. It is this same God who comes to me in the night season when I fix my mind on him. Like the child who has known hunger sleeps peacefully holding the bread, I find rest for my soul holding onto the promises of the one who gave himself to me as the bread of life.
Thursday, March 12, 2015
To Carry a Holy Burden
"Their responsibility was service related to the holy objects carried on their shoulders."(Numbers 7:9) The sons of Kohath had an unusual service to preform for God. They were from the priestly line of Levi and their service was to carry a holy burden on their shoulders. Some of their relatives were given carts and oxen but not them - theirs was a humble duty. They were not allowed to look at or touch these holy things, but only carry them on their shoulders.
I have known many people who carry what seem to be burdens placed on their shoulders by God. The burdens I've seen have been illnesses, an unexpected loss of a loved one, a hurtful relationship, or a painful situation. Often these burdens come without explanation. My life has been enriched by those who have humbly accepted these burdens from the Lord. I have watched a holy transformation take place while those chosen by God quietly carried the burden placed upon their shoulders.
The sons of Korah, however, did not humbly accept the service God required of them. They rebelled. I would like to stand in harsh judgement of them, but I can't. I have at times rebelled myself when asked to bear burdens that I considered unfair or that I didn't understand. However, I find a grave warning in the story of the rebellion of the sons of Korah. At the heart of every rebellion is the sin of pride. (Numbers 16)
There came a time when the sons of Korah were no longer required to serve God by carrying the holy objects on their shoulders. Once the tabernacle rested and no longer had to be carried in the wilderness, the remaining sons of Korah were given a new job. They were put in charge of the service of song in the house of the Lord. They exchanged the burden that God gave them for a song of praise.
As I thought about this unique service that God required of the sons of Korah I realized that in reality He had given them a great honor. I saw in their unique service a type of the Son of God who carried on his shoulders a holy burden through which salvation came. It is this same Jesus who invited anyone who would be his disciple to daily deny himself, take up his cross, and follow him.
I have known many people who carry what seem to be burdens placed on their shoulders by God. The burdens I've seen have been illnesses, an unexpected loss of a loved one, a hurtful relationship, or a painful situation. Often these burdens come without explanation. My life has been enriched by those who have humbly accepted these burdens from the Lord. I have watched a holy transformation take place while those chosen by God quietly carried the burden placed upon their shoulders.
The sons of Korah, however, did not humbly accept the service God required of them. They rebelled. I would like to stand in harsh judgement of them, but I can't. I have at times rebelled myself when asked to bear burdens that I considered unfair or that I didn't understand. However, I find a grave warning in the story of the rebellion of the sons of Korah. At the heart of every rebellion is the sin of pride. (Numbers 16)
There came a time when the sons of Korah were no longer required to serve God by carrying the holy objects on their shoulders. Once the tabernacle rested and no longer had to be carried in the wilderness, the remaining sons of Korah were given a new job. They were put in charge of the service of song in the house of the Lord. They exchanged the burden that God gave them for a song of praise.
As I thought about this unique service that God required of the sons of Korah I realized that in reality He had given them a great honor. I saw in their unique service a type of the Son of God who carried on his shoulders a holy burden through which salvation came. It is this same Jesus who invited anyone who would be his disciple to daily deny himself, take up his cross, and follow him.
Saturday, March 7, 2015
Rebuilding
In a very professional tone he told me that every extra ten pounds a person weighs is the equivalent of carrying a concrete block on their feet. Then he paused, shifted his weight onto one foot, crossed his arms, lifted his eye brows and spoke. He made no attempt to hide the disdain that came with his next words, "And you, you are carrying around a LOT of concrete blocks." Having delivered his message he took his clip board and walked out of the room. His words stung.
The sting did not go away. I realized that many of my health issues were my own fault. I was reminded of something David said in the Psalms, "My strength has failed because of my sinfulness" (Psalm 31:10). My sinfulness wasn't due to a lack of will power, just the opposite, it was because I had too much will power. In the deepest recesses of my heart was a rebellious spirit.
A rebellious spirit is not conquered by will power but by humility. Will power says, "I am in control of what I do or not do. No one will tell me what I can or cannot eat!" It was Eve's will power that introduced sin into the garden. Humility on the other hand is being willing to surrender your will. Will power says, "I can gain the victory on my own." Humility's response to sin is a cry for help.
The first step of a humble response is to accept the truth and offer no excuses. The next step is to cast our cares on God believing that He really cares for us. God has promised that He gives grace to those who humble themselves but He resists the proud.
This is an uncomfortable place to be. I don't really want to be humble. I want to write a long list of excuses. Everything inside me screams at the thought of surrendering my will. As the doctor so creatively put it, I have a LOT of concrete blocks I'm carrying around. So, to be truthful I'm haunted by the question, "Is there hope for someone like me?"
Is there hope? Hope is a confident expectation of good based on who God is and His promises to me. Hope in and of itself is a gift of the Holy Spirit. The God I serve is the God of Hope and I have always found that with hope comes joy and peace.
I find in the book of Zechariah the encouragement that was given to a fellow sinner who was having to rebuild God's temple that had been destroyed because of sin. In this passage Zerubbabel is told that the rebuilding that needs to take place will not be accomplished by might or power but instead by the Spirit of God. He is also told not to despise the day of small beginnings.
So here I am wanting to let go of my rebellious spirit, admitting that my sin has caused my body - this temple of the Holy Spirit- to be damaged. I am humbly calling out to God for help not relying on my own power but instead relying on His grace and His Holy Spirit. I choose not to despise the day of small beginnings but instead I choose to fix my eyes on the God of Hope.
The sting did not go away. I realized that many of my health issues were my own fault. I was reminded of something David said in the Psalms, "My strength has failed because of my sinfulness" (Psalm 31:10). My sinfulness wasn't due to a lack of will power, just the opposite, it was because I had too much will power. In the deepest recesses of my heart was a rebellious spirit.
A rebellious spirit is not conquered by will power but by humility. Will power says, "I am in control of what I do or not do. No one will tell me what I can or cannot eat!" It was Eve's will power that introduced sin into the garden. Humility on the other hand is being willing to surrender your will. Will power says, "I can gain the victory on my own." Humility's response to sin is a cry for help.
The first step of a humble response is to accept the truth and offer no excuses. The next step is to cast our cares on God believing that He really cares for us. God has promised that He gives grace to those who humble themselves but He resists the proud.
This is an uncomfortable place to be. I don't really want to be humble. I want to write a long list of excuses. Everything inside me screams at the thought of surrendering my will. As the doctor so creatively put it, I have a LOT of concrete blocks I'm carrying around. So, to be truthful I'm haunted by the question, "Is there hope for someone like me?"
Is there hope? Hope is a confident expectation of good based on who God is and His promises to me. Hope in and of itself is a gift of the Holy Spirit. The God I serve is the God of Hope and I have always found that with hope comes joy and peace.
I find in the book of Zechariah the encouragement that was given to a fellow sinner who was having to rebuild God's temple that had been destroyed because of sin. In this passage Zerubbabel is told that the rebuilding that needs to take place will not be accomplished by might or power but instead by the Spirit of God. He is also told not to despise the day of small beginnings.
So here I am wanting to let go of my rebellious spirit, admitting that my sin has caused my body - this temple of the Holy Spirit- to be damaged. I am humbly calling out to God for help not relying on my own power but instead relying on His grace and His Holy Spirit. I choose not to despise the day of small beginnings but instead I choose to fix my eyes on the God of Hope.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)