Don’t be Afraid of the Struggle

I saw that my friend was struggling and I asked her about it. I knew that she had gone through some very difficult situations. She was grieving the loss of many whom she loved. She was facing a life-altering illness. She told me that she didn’t think it was right to complain to God. She had been told that when you come before God it should only be with praise.

My friend is a strong and disciplined woman who wants to do what is right. I told her that when we come before our Heavenly Father we are invited to be vulnerable. He doesn’t want us to come wearing a mask. In fact, no matter how old or mature you are, when you enter His presence you enter as His child. I remember when I was a child I could often contain my emotions and hide my hurt. But when I saw my mother I would burst into tears. I was safe in her presence to express the depth of my emotions.

Sometimes it’s hard to put into words what you’re feeling. I believe that is one of the reasons God gave us the Psalms. Consider the words of Psalm 142, "I pour out my complaint before Him; I reveal my trouble to Him. Although my spirit is weak within me, You know my way." The Psalm continues with these words, "I cry to You, Lord; I say, 'You are my shelter, my portion in the land of the living.' Listen to my cry, for I am very weak. Rescue me from those who pursue me, for they are too strong for me. Free me from prison so that I can praise Your name. The righteous will gather around me because You deal generously with me."

Grief can be a prison. Suffering with a life-altering illness can make you feel like you are being pursued by an enemy. We come vulnerable and sometimes weeping into the presence of the one who knows us best. We come acknowledging our weaknesses and claiming His strength. Like a child throwing themselves into the arms of a loving parent so too we are invited to cast all of our care on our Heavenly Father because He cares for us.

I reminded my friend also that there is a whole book of the Bible entitled Lamentations. It is a book filled with honest grief and the confusion that often accompanies those times. Yet, in the heart of this book we find hope. "Because of the Lord’s faithful love we do not perish, for His mercies never end. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness! I say: The Lord is my portion, therefore I will put my hope in Him." (Lamentations 3:25-27)

So I reached out my hand to my friend, not as someone who is strong and has it all together, but as a sister who understands what it is to cry and to be weak. I reminded her that not only did our Father give us words to express the deepest cries of our heart and a book entitled Lamentations, He gave us each other. He did not design us to be alone. He made us a family. He knows that there are times when we not only need the words to express our hearts we also need the physical touch of a friend who can weep with us.