Humbled by the Mystery

"There are those hearts, reader, that never mend again once they are broken. Or if they mend, they heal themselves in a crooked and lopsided way, as if sewn together by a careless craftsman."--Kate DiCamillo, The Tale of Despereaux So what do you do when you find your heart has become scarred?

Every year when I read through the Bible I find myself invited into the throne-room of Heaven on the day when the sons of God come to present themselves before the LORD. Every year I find myself ease dropping on a peculiar conversation. "And the LORD said to Satan, 'Have you considered my servant Job, there is none like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, who fears God and turns away from evil?'"(Job 1:8) And every year I watch as the heart of Job is broken.

I don't really understand what's going on. I find this book uncomfortable and to be honest a bit painful. There are things that have happened in my own life that have broken my heart. Things that I don't understand. I look at Job's friends trying to make since of what has happened by blaming Job and hoping to put a little distance between who they are and who he is. They want to assure themselves that what happened to him could never happen to them.

I finished the book of Job today. I read carefully what the LORD said when He answered Job out of the whirlwind,"Who is this that darkens counsel by words without knowledge?"(Job 38:2) I'm always intrigued that the LORD doesn't tell Job what we read in the first chapter of this book. What I do see in God's response to Job is that healing, true healing can only come with humility. What I see is that I have been invited to be part of a mystery that is bigger than I am.

LORD I come before You today and acknowledge that I don't really understand everything that is going on in my life but I trust You. I want to walk humbly before You so that when my heart has become broken it won't become hard and scarred by my pride. I believe that when You heal my heart I can say like Job, "I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees you."(Job 42:5)