Failure is NOT an Option

On the Sunday before my surgery God gave me a song. It was a song that put into words the deepest yearning of my heart. When I heard it being sung by a woman’s voice I began to sing along using her voice to sing my song of surrender. I felt that this was so very dear of my Savior since following my surgery half my face became paralyzed and for a while I lost my ability to communicate. When I sang Oceans (where feet may fail) I was no longer alone. I was part of a chorus, part of the body of Christ whom the Lord had called out to go on a journey. A journey into the wildness to learn the lesson of trust, the lesson of compete surrender. The song Oceans (where feet my fail) became my song of surrender.

I felt that the Lord had not only given me a song of surrender but also the understanding that He was going to take me on a journey through difficult times. I understood that I was going on a journey to a place in my life where I would have no control. He showed me that it would be similar to when He called the Children of Israel out of Egypt. Out of bondage and into a wilderness. 

My instructions were very clear: “Do not murmur or complain!” To murmur or complain would be to rebel against the journey He had chosen to take me on. My response was to say, “My Lord, it is the deepest desire of my heart to walk with You in humble obedience. I want Your will more than I want my will. I know my flesh is weak and that I have a tendency, if not to complain out loud, still to murmur under my breath. I also know that in my own strength it would be impossible for me to do as You ask. But I know You, and I know that You are not asking me to do this in my strength but Yours. May it be done unto me according to Your will.”

And, after all, isn’t that what God was doing in the wilderness? Stripping Egypt from out of His children’s hearts by taking them to a place where they were utterly helpless; inviting His children to stop trying to be in control and to instead rest in the reality that only He is really in control. So why rebel like tiny children against a loving Father? Why not just surrender our will and let Him teach us to trust Him? Yes, I said teach. Because trust can only be taught in the wilderness. And we can never trust Him unless He teaches us how, because we lost that ability in the garden when man decided that they didn’t want to trust God, but instead they wanted to be God. And since they would not learn the lesson of trust in the garden, our longsuffering God took His children to the wilderness to teach them the lesson of trust.

And so with a song of surrender in my heart I followed where my Shepherd was leading. Along with so many others who have gone before I went into the wilderness where I may fail, but He will never fail. I know that in the end I will learn to trust. And by His grace I will receive this discipline with humble gratitude, neither grumbling nor complaining.

Link to the YouTube video for “Oceans (where feet may fail)”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dy9nwe9_xzw