Learning to Fly With a Broken Wing

"It isn't fair that some people get everything while other people have nothing." A young woman said this to me while I was sitting in my mother's living room holding my infant daughter. She and I had had similar mental struggles but I had gone on to marry and now had a beautiful baby she was still struggling. But her perception of my perfect life was faulty, while she had just come back from a trip to Israel I had gone to visit my mother because the mobile home I was living in had become rat infested and I was staying with my mother until the rats were gone.

The next year that young woman committed suicide. When I think about my friend it makes me sad. When she died I wondered how can you learn to fly with a broken wing? She and I had both gone through experiences that in some ways crippled us. As I look back over the thirty years of my life since her death I realize that life can be very hard. I also realize that I have learned the secret of flying  with a broken wing.

I often struggle with depression. For me it's not always just the situations of life that can cause this heaviness that keeps me earth bound it is also a chemical imbalance. Yet I believe that I do not have to give up without a fight. Every morning I start my day by setting my mind on things above. I read in Psalm 100 that we are to, "Enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise! Give thanks to him and praise his name." Often my choice to obey this verse does not match my feelings.

Now here is the secret to flying with a broken wing it's faith. Every day I am invited to be sure of what I hope for and confident about what I do not see or feel. Each new day I wake and wait on the Lord watching as the Sun comes up on the horizon. I offer my sacrifice of praise and thanksgiving believing that He who has promised is faithful. As I wait I gain strength for the day and hope for tomorrow. And then it happens my heart is no longer earth bound. I am mounting up on the wings of an eagle.

Father, thank You for never leaving me of forsaking me. You told me that I am not to base my life on what I see or feel but on Your love and promises. In You I find everything I need to face the challenges of this life. In You I have renewed strength. I can run and not grow weary, walk and not faint. I can even fly with a broken wing.