Don't be afraid to grieve

I was standing at the sink washing dishes. The feeling of grief was so strong I just wanted to escape. I found myself wanting to disconnect from the painful emotions.  In the background I could hear my children's voices and I realized that if I emotionally disconnected from my grief  I would not be able to be emotionally connected with them. I chose instead to walk through the valley of death with tears in my eyes but not alone.

I didn't want to grieve because I din't want to be vulnerable. I liked to be in control, control of situations and in control of my emotions. The problem was if  I chose not to feel the pain of grief  I would put a wall around my heart and not only would I not be able to feel my grief  I would also isolate myself from everyone's grief, including my children's.

So where do I turn when I feel this pain where can I go for comfort? I turn to Jesus. "He was despised and rejected by men, a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering....Surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows....But he was pierced for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed...For he bore the sin of many, and made intercession for the transgressor." Isaiah 53

I grieve but not without hope. Hope is a confident expectation of good. In my seasons of grieving I experience comfort. I know that,"weeping endures for the night but joy comes in the morning."Psalm 30:5  Because I have experienced not only the weeping but the joy I can share this truth with my children.