Sandpaper on my soul

"And just look at this view! One thing you can be sure of you will always have this view."  I loved the view out of my picture window. I choose that spot to have my quiet time in the morning. I would wake at dawn wrapped in a blanket and begin reading my Bible and talking to God.

BANG! BANG! BANG! Something terrible was happening. My neighbor bought the small triangle of land behind our house. The piece of land we had been assured that was to small to build on and he was building on it! Suddenly my view was completely blocked. The only thing I could see was my neighbor.

I was so angry I couldn't read my Bible, I couldn't focus to pray. He would be working on building his shop at dawn. Since he didn't go to church he would be out there banging all Sunday. "Hope you don't mind that I've taken you view", he said one day. "No!', I lied ,'you bought the land it's yours".

I kept trying to have my quiet time with God but it wasn't quiet. It wasn't just the lack of external quiet that bothered me I didn't have any internal quiet either. I began to pray to find relief. However, the message I heard from God did not bring comfort, it brought conviction.

"Sarah, what is more important to you, your view or your neighbor's soul." There was no question about it my view and my comfort were much more important to me that the salvation of my neighbor. In admitting this I also saw that my comfort was an idol I worshiped.

So now what was I supposed to do? I no longer had my view and my sin had been exposed? I confessed my sin and asked God for mercy because I knew I couldn't change on my own. I also knew He didn't want me just to pretend to care now that my lack of love was exposed.

I wish I could say that suddenly I no longer cared that my view was gone but it still irritated me. As I prayed about it God spoke to me. "Sarah, I have given you a visual reminder to pray for your neighbor and yourself." So my irritation became a call to prayer.

 It was like sandpaper on my soul. I continually prayed that God would change both me and my neighbor and He did.