Beyond the Mist

The phone rang and as soon as I heard his voice I knew the message it carried. He was calling to tell me my friend was dead. I felt a deep sorrow. I spent the rest of the day remembering times I had spent with her as if they were scenes from a movie. I also thought, "What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes." (James 4:14)

All day I thought about my friend, remembering the first time we met; how we would watch our children play together. I had always enjoyed her artistic approach to every day things, and her ability to find treasures at yard sales was legendary. But now, like a vapor that floats for a while in the air but which disappears with the heat of the rising sun, my friend was gone. 

I had shared many things with my friend but there was one part of my life she did not want to participate in. She wanted nothing to do with my faith. She was always very kind, and when we were together she would invite me to pray before meals; but she did not join in the prayer. She allowed me to freely talk about my faith with her, because she loved me and understood that what I believed was a intricate part of who I was, but always made it clear that she did not share those beliefs. "Man is like a breath; his days are like a fleeting shadow." (Psalm 144:4) Like a fleeting shadow my friend was gone.

That Evening I received a second phone call. It was from my friend's brother. He was calling to tell me what had happened on Christmas Eve two days before she had died. "I want you to know this because I know you prayed for my sister and I do not want you to grieve like those who have no hope." He told me how he had share the gospel with his sister. He told her, "As Moses lifted up the serpent in the wilderness so must the Son of Man be lifted up, that whoever believed in him may have eternal life. For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life." (John 3:14-16) She lifted her eyes believed in God's Son and received eternal life. Her brother and I wept together but in the midst of sorrow there was the joy that we would see her in eternity.

Father, I do not understand Your love that though our life here on earth is like a vapor You have given us Your Son so that whoever believes on Him might not perish but have eternal life. Thank You that even though I grieve the loss of my friend I am confident that I will see her again.

Letting Go of the Rope

"I am totally at the end of my rope." When I read these words that my friend had written me I wanted to whisper in response, “Then let go of the rope." 

We live in a broken world. In fact "The whole world is under the control of the evil one." (1 John 5:19) We live in a broken world under the control of the evil one and Jesus told us, "In this world you will have tribulation." The word tribulation comes from the Greek word thlipsis . When I researched the word in "HELPS Word-Studies"[www.helpsbible.com] I found it meant pressure (what constricts or rubs together), used of a narrow place that "hems someone in;" tribulation, especially internal pressure that causes someone to feel confined (restricted, “without option"). This Greek word carries the challenge of coping with the internal pressure of a tribulation, especially when feeling there is "no way of escape." But Jesus didn't simply tell us that we would have tribulation in this world. He said, "But take heart; I have overcome the world." (John 16:33)

I understand this desperate feeling of clinging to the end of the rope when the world is pressing in and crying out, "I'm trying as hard as I can!" This is when I hear my Savior whisper, "Let go of the rope." Letting go of my striving I find myself plunged into His grace. As I let go of my desperate hold on the rope I cry out, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." (Galatians 2:20) In the process of letting go of the rope and taking hold of the promise I find peace.

Sometimes when I am feeling hemmed in by the pressures of life I forget the truth. I forget that I have been invited to rest in the love of God not because of what I have done for Him but because of what He has done for me. The place I find victory is not in striving but in trusting. When I walk in the truth of His love for me then I am sure of what I hope for and confident about what I don't see.

Lord Jesus, thank You for inviting me into that place of perfect peace. Thank You that I can let go of the rope and find myself safe in Your arms. Please help me share this truth with others.

You Don't Have to Be in Control

The world had become to big for him. He was hiding in my closet. He looked so vulnerable, so scared and small. Quietly I joined him. I didn't come to lecture, I didn't come with answers, I came to listen. I held him as he poured out his fears, his anger, his tears. We sat together in the darkness. I have learned you don't have to have all the answers if you've found a resting place in the one who does.

I looked into the eyes of my beautiful friend and saw a cloud of sorrow there. I listened as she told me about her disappointment. When she opened the door to her heart and began telling me about her broken dreams the tears began to flow. "It's alright to be vulnerable," I said, "You don't have to be in control. You are safe. You are not alone."

It was long ago when the lie was told and then believed. "You can be like God knowing good and evil." Innocents died and naked vulnerability was clothed with the harsh lie of control. In the cool of the evening God came to garden to invite the created to enter into sweet fellowship with the Creator but they were hiding and fellowship was broken. Death had come when the lie was believed. Now there would be pain and thorns and thistles to control. But all was not lost there was also the promise of a Redeemer.

The one who came to set us free was born as a vulnerable infant. There was no power of wealth associated with the parents he chose. When he was born there were whispers of shame that some associated with his birth. He entered into history at a time when there was oppression and bondage. He tasted our tears, carried our grief and bore our sorrows. He came to the thorn infested garden to show us a way to be free from the bondage of the lie that we were in control.

Jesus, thank You for coming. Thank You for entering into our weakness so that we could enter into Your strength.

"Mark My Footsteps My Dear Child"

Whenever I couldn't remember the exact words to a song I would make them up. This was not real problem unless I was singing with other people. However, this did make it difficult for my children because they were familiar with the words I put to the song and were confused when others sang the same song in a different way.

Recently I went to a friend's house for a carol sing. One of the songs we sang was, "Good King Wenceslas." It's a fun song to sing. There was one verse in the song that stuck in my head. It stuck in my head slightly altered from it's original form.

"Father, the night is darker now
And the wind blows stronger
Fails my heart, I know not how,
        I can go no longer."
"Mark my footsteps, my dear child
      Tread thou in them boldly
Thou shalt find the winter's rage
  Freeze thy blood less coldly."

As I have sung my version of this song I have thought about my parents. When I was a child I thought they simply did what came naturally. I know better now. Now I know that the decisions they made were guided by their choice to follow in Jesus' footsteps. I have been blessed beyond measure by their example and I pray that my children will be able to find shelter from the winter's rage by following me as well.

Lord Jesus, this Christmas I thank You again for humbling Yourself and coming to us in human form. Thank you for leaving us not only footsteps to follow but for giving us Your Holy Spirit.

The Deep Comfort of Christmas

The Sun has yet to rise this morning but because my house is dark the Christmas lights are even more beautiful. There has been so much sorrow in the news this week. In the quiet of this morning I have been comforting myself by reading the words to Christmas carols. Sometimes I find the deepest comfort embedded in the heart of the carols.

"All ye, beneath life's crushing load, whose forms are bending low, who toil along the climbing way with painful steps and slow. Look now! for glad and golden hours come swiftly on the wing: O rest beside the weary road, and hear the angels sing! For lo! the days are hastning on, by prophet barbs foretold  when with the ever circling years come round the age of gold; when peace shall over all the earth its ancient splendors fling, and the whole world give back the song which now the angels sing." This song reminds me of how my grandmother found deep comfort by reading the prophets. She marveled at the prophecies that were fulfilled at Jesus' birth and studied the prophecies that point to His second coming with anticipation like that of a young child who waits for Christmas morning.

"I heard the bells on Christmas day their old familiar carols play, and wild and sweet the words repeat of peace on earth, goodwill to men. I thought how, as the day had come the belfries of all Christendom had rolled along th'unbroken song of peace on earth, goodwill to men. And in despair I bowed my head; "There is no peace on earth," I said, "For hate is strong  and mocks the song of peace on earth, goodwill to men" Then pealed the bells more loud and deep: "God is not dead nor doth He sleep; The wrong shall fail, the right prevail  with peace on earth, goodwill to men." Till, ringing, singing on its way, the world revolved from night to day, a voice, a chime, a chant sublime, of peace on earth, goodwill to men!

"Comfort, comfort ye my people, speak peace, thus said our God; Comfort those who sit in darkness, mourning 'neath sorrows' load. Speak ye to Jerusalem of the peace that waits for them; tell her that her sins I cover, and her warfare now is over  Hark the voice of one that crieth in the desert far and near, biding all men to repentance since the kingdom now is here. O that warning cry obey! Now prepare for God a way; let the valley rise to meet him, and the hills bow down to greet him. Make ye straight what long was crooked, make the rougher places plain  let your hearts be true and humble, as befits his holy reign. For the glory of the Lord now o'er earth is shed abroad; and all flesh shall see the token that his word is never broken.

Father, your light penetrates my darkness and when your songs inter my heart and I find deep comfort as I sing. "O come, thou Day spring  come and cheer, Our spirits by thine advent here, Disperse the gloomy clouds of night, and death's dark shadows put to flight. Rejoice! Rejoice! Emanuel shall come to thee , O Israel!

The Candle is Lit

The candle is lit, it illumines the darkness and I know His presents is in this place. The quiet of the sanctuary fills my being with a since of awe and wonder. Mother and Daddy woke me from a sound sleep to dress me and bring me to church at Midnight. The room is dark except for the flickering light of the candles. The air is filled with the smell of sweet perfume and the sounds of worship. Now I see what I've been waiting for, the Nativity.

The candle is lit. When the light of the world came into our darkness there were shepherds out in the fields, keeping watch over their flocks by night. "Suddenly, an angel of the Lord appeared among them, and the radiance of the Lord's glory surrounded them."(Luke 2:9) They were common people yet they had been invited come and see the baby wrapped in swaddling clothes and lying in a manger. And now here I was just a common little girl wrapped in the wonder of Jesus' birth.

The candle is lit. I'm sitting, waiting, holding my unlit candle. All through the service the the sanctuary has been lit by the flickering lights of the candles but now the flame is being passed from one candle to another. Now it's my turn I touch the wick of my candle to the flame. "I am the light of the world. The one who follows me will never walk in darkness." (John 8:12)

The candle is lit. When I was a little girl the light of the candle reminded me that I had come to worship. At Christmas time when I was entrusted with a burning candle I was reminded that I, like the shepherds, had been invited to participate in celebrating the coming of the Savior.

Lord Jesus, You are the light of the world. The night of your birth the armies of heaven proclaimed, "Glory to God in the highest heaven, and peace on earth to those with whom God is pleased." Lord, You came into our darkness to bring us light You entered into our chaos to bring us peace. Please let me carry within me Your light.

"Be Ready For the Son of Man is Coming"

When I was a senior in high school I wrote a paper about all the prophecies Jesus fulfilled in His first coming. I can still remember the since of wonder I was filled with as I explored the scriptures in this way for the first time. It was as if I was discovering arrows of light that pointed to the truth.

One of the prophecies was that men would have eyes but they would not see and ears but they would not hear. I see this clearly when the wise men came to Jerusalem saying, "Where is he who has been born king of the Jews? For we saw his star when it rose and have come to worship him."( Matthew 2:3) This was not done in secret Herod and all Jerusalem were troubled. This was not the first hint that the messiah had been born.

When Jesus was eight days old his parents had taken him to the temple to be dedicated. Simeon who had been waiting for the consolation of Israel when he saw Jesus proclaimed, "Lord, now you are letting your servant depart in peace, according to your word; for my eyes have seen you salvation that you have prepared in the presence of all people, a light for revelation to the Gentiles, and for the glory of your people Israel." (Luke 2:29-32) The Prophetess Anna had recognized who Jesus was and, "She began to give thanks to God and to speak of him to all who were waiting for the redemption of Jerusalem."(Luke 2:38) These things took place not in a remote place but in the temple at Jerusalem.

Now here they were a caravan of Gentiles following the light of a star just like Simeon had proclaimed in the temple! Herod assembled all the chief priests and scribes of the peoples, he inquired of them where the Christ was to be born. They told him, "In Bethlehem of Judea, for so it is written by the prophet: "'And you, O Bethlehem, in the land of Judah; for from you shall come a ruler who will shepherd my people Israel.'"(Matthew 2:6) They knew what was written by the prophets.

There are prophecies yet to be fulfilled prophecies about Jesus' second coming. "Tell us, when will these things be, and what will be the sign of your coming and of the close of the age?" Matthew 24 is Jesus' response to his disciples question. Jesus told them,"But concerning that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son but the Father only. As were the days of Noah, so will be the coming of the Son of Man."What were the days of Noah like? "The earth also was corrupt before God, and the earth was filled with violence." (Genesis 6:11)

Lord Jesus, I do not want to be like those who missed Your first coming. You told Your disciples to, "Be ready, for the Son of Man is coming at an hour you do not expect." Help me to understand the times in which I live. Help me to have eyes that sees and a heart that understands. Grant that I might be like Simeon and Anna and live my life with a since of anticipation.

Our Deliverer Has Come

 I stood in the middle of the kitchen and wept. The radio was on and I heard for the first time the details about the shooting that had taken place that day at an elementary school. I felt overwhelmed by sorrow. In my mind I could see the faces of my own children and grandchildren at that young age. I grieved for the children and the families and for all of us because these children in some ways belong to all of us.

“A voice was heard in Ramah, weeping and loud lamentation, Rachel weeping for her children; she refused to be comforted, because they are no more.” (Matthew 2:18) This too is part of the Christmas story. Why did Jesus come? He came to be the deliverer to rescue us, “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.” (Ephesians 6:12)

Sometimes I feel that at Christmas time everyone should be happy but this reflects a very shallow understanding of why Jesus came. Jesus came in response to the tender mercy of our God to be our deliverer to save us from the Power of Darkness. Jesus came, “To give knowledge of salvation to his people in the forgiveness of their sins, because of the tender mercy of our God, whereby the sunrise shall visit us from on high to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace.” (Luke 2:77-79)

Last Sunday we sang “Our Deliverer is Coming” by Rich Mullins. The song was particularly touching because we had a small choir of young children who sang the chores. These are the word to the song;

Joseph took his wife and her child

And they went to Africa

To escape the rage of a deadly King

There along the banks of the Nile

Jesus listened to the song

That the captive children used to sing

They were singing’

My deliverer is comin’, my deliverer is standing by

My deliverer is comin’, my deliverer is standing by

Through a dry and thirsty land

Water from the Kenyon heights

Pours itself out of lake  Sangra’s broken heart

There I the Sahara winds

Jesus heard the whole world cry

For the healin’ that would flow from His  own scars

The world was singn’

My deliverer is comin’, my deliverer is standin’ by

My deliverer is comin’, my deliverer is standin’ by

He will never break His promise

He has written it upon the sky

My deliverer is comin’, my deliverer is standin’ by

My deliverer is comin’, my deliverer is standin’ by

I will never doubt His promise

Though I doubt my heart, I doubt my eyes

My deliverer is comin’, my deliverer is standin’ by

My deliverer is comin’, my deliverer is standin’ by

He will never break his promise

Though the stars should break faith with the sky

Father, yesterday the thin membrane that separates us from the evil one was ruptured. I am reminded of that first Christmas when there was the sound of weeping and lamentations, mothers weeping for their children refusing to be comforted because their children had been taken from them. Two thousand year later the sound of weeping mothers can be heard again. Thank You, for sending your son into this broken world to be our deliverer.

The Torch is Lit and I am Waiting

She was my Grandfather's sister. Aunt Ellen had always been a kind and generous presence in my childhood, so when my Mother told me she was on her death bed I went to visit her.

She looked so small and frail in her hospital bed. I wasn't sure if she would know who I was or not, but when our eyes met I knew she did. She told me to pull a chair up next to her bed, then she reached out and took my hand. "Sarah, my mother always hoped that she would live to see the return of Christ. When she died she passed the hope to me. Now I pass this torch of hope to you. Live your life with the anticipation that Jesus may return in your lifetime."

This morning I was reading to my grandson about Simeon. "Now there was a man in Jerusalem, whose name was Simeon, and this man was righteous and devout, waiting for the consolation of Israel, and the Holy Spirit was upon him. And it had been revealed to him by the Holy Spirit that he would not see death before he had seen the Lord's Christ." (Luke 2:25,26) We read how he had come in the Spirit to the temple on the very day Joseph and Mary had brought Jesus.

I told Jack that when Jesus had ascended into Heaven angels had appeared and had told the disciples that this very same Jesus would return in like fashion. I have carried this torch of anticipation all my life, and now it was my turn to share it with the next generation. "Jack, Jesus is coming back again. Simeon was there is see Him the first time Jesus came. Perhaps you will be alive when Jesus returns. Live your life with this anticipation."

Lord Jesus, I am reminded of what You said in the last chapter of Revelation, "'Surely I am coming soon.' Amen. Come Lord Jesus!"(Revelation 22:20)

The Relationship Between Repentance and Peace

"I like your web-site but you have to test the spelling on quite a few of your posts. A number of them are rife with spelling issues." This was one of the comments I found on my Blog. I am often concerned not only that I might spell something wrong but also that I might have run on sentences, comma slices, and even sentence fragments. I do proof read what I write but still I often find it difficult to see my own mistakes. This would be the benefit of having someone else to edit my work.

This is not just a problem with my writing this is a problem I have in general. I have a very difficult time seeing where I am wrong. The other night I got into a fight with my husband. It began when I did something that hurt his feelings. My response was to justify myself and point out his faults. His faults were obvious to me but I was blind to my own.

As I was going to sleep I prayed a prayer I often pray, "Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts." (Psalm 139:23) God answered that prayer and I was finally able to see where I had offended my husband. The light penetrated my darkness and only then could I see where I had been self centered.

This incident made me think about the relationship between repentance and peace. Until I was able to see that I had wronged my husband and that I needed to repent we didn't have peace between us. Not only that but I didn't have within myself either. When God sent John to prepare the way for the Savior his message was one of repentance. In order to receive the Peace from Heaven there had first be the acknowledgement and repentance of sin.

Zechariah said, "And you, child, will be called the prophet of the Most High; for you will go before the Lord to prepare his way, to give knowledge of salvation to his people in the forgiveness of their sins, because of the tender mercy of our God, whereby the sunrise shall visit us from on high to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace."(Luke 1:75-79)

Did I Miss It?

I thought I had plenty of time but now I find myself sitting in the dark wondering if I'm to late and it has passed me by. Did I miss it?

All these back roads look the same and there is no light. I can hardly see the curve of the road. Where am I? How did I get so lost! I thought I knew where I was going. I thought I knew where this road would take me but now I don't know where I am. I was wrong. Now I know that I am lost!

Walking on a deserted country road I suddenly feel afraid. I don't know what I'm afraid of but the fear is almost tangible it's like a warning to turn and go a different direction. I obey the warning and find out latter that a murderer lived down the road I was about to walk on.

I have a shepherd. There are times in my life when I feel like I have missed out on what I was supposed to do with my life except that as a child I asked Jesus to be my Savior. Jesus said that He was the Good Shepherd and ever since I was a child I have asked Him to guide me. So I choose to silence my doubts by trusting my shepherd.

I have a shepherd and this is a good thing because like sheep I have a tendency to loose my way. One of my favorite Psalms is Psalm 119. "With my whole heart I seek you; let me not wander from your commandments! I have stored up your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you. Open my eyes, that I may behold wondrous things out of your law. I am a sojourner on the earth; hide not your commandment from me!" (Psalm 119:10,11,18,19) In this Psalm I see a passionate love for God's word. My heart resonates with the Psalmist passion. However, I also whisper the last verse of this Psalm in prayer as well. "I have gone astray like a lost sheep; seek your servant, for I do not forget your commandments." (Psalm 119: 176)

I have a shepherd. I need a shepherd because I also have an enemy that comes to steal and kill and destroy. This spiritual enemy is just as real as the murderer who lived down the street. Jesus said, "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full. I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep." ( John 10:10,11) I not only have a shepherd, I have a Savior.

Lord Jesus, like a sheep I do not know the path I am to take. Thank You for guiding me. Like a lamb that wanders off I too have sometimes lost my way. Thank You for seeking me. I have walked in the valley of the shadow of death. Thank You for being my Savior.

"Overshadowed"

Has your life ever been overshadowed by something? The definition of the word overshadow is:
1. to exceed in importance.
    "the tragedy overshadowed the couple's happiness"
2. to cast a shadow over.
     "the scandal followed her all her life."

This year I have had some health issues and I discovered that via the Internet I could spend hours doing researching if I chose to. However, I chose not to do that because I was afraid that if I did it would overshadow everything else in my life. I did not want to define who I am by things like that.

Although I chose not be overshadowed by my health issues there is something I do choose to be overshadowed by. I want to be overshadowed in the same way Mary was when the Gabriel said to her, "The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you." (Luke 1:35)

In my life this overshadowing took place when I was baptized into Christ Jesus. "We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life." (Romans 6:4) This new life is lived in the power of the Holy Spirit.

Lord Jesus, I come to You and ask that I might decrees and that You would increase in my life. I want to be alive to You and dead to me. Please fill me today with Your Holy Spirit.

"But Mama, Who Will Light the Christmas Candle?"

The year was 1973. I was young and very much in the love with the man who would become my husband. It was our first Christmas together and it was at that first celebration that I was introduced to the lighting of the Christmas candle. I didn't know then that this lighting of the Christmas candle would become one of my most cherished Christmas traditions.

Samuel Hardiman Jones Sr. held in his gnarled hands an old brass candle holder. The skin on his hands was as transparent as his heart and the tears slid unbidden down his wrinkled cheeks. The brass candle holder had once belonged to his mother. As he lit the candle he was reminded of the
Christmases of his childhood when his mother's young hand held the light on those dark December nights of long ago. His mother was now a sweet memory that was awaken every Christmas when he would hold in his hand the same candle holder that she had held in her hand and he would weep.

I learned that year that tears were part of the Christmas celebration. Samuel Hardiman Jones Sr. with a voice that chocked with emotion explained the significance of the brass candle holder. Then he lit the candle and as he did he spoke about the tender mercy of God. "This light is to remind us that we have been visited by the sunrise from on high. Jesus has come to give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace."

When Great Granddaddy died I was given the antique brass candle holder. Every year I would ask Papa, Great Granddaddy's son, to light the Christmas candle. He would take the candle holder into his hands that had become twisted by the years and he would pause as the tears gathered in his eyes. With a voice husky with emotion he would light the candle and remind us that Christmas is about when the light of the world penetrated our darkness.

The year Papa died was difficult. His bride of sixty four years had died just six days before him. As Christmas was approaching my daughter broke down and wept. Beside the olive wood nativity I had placed the candle holder. "But Mama, who will light the Christmas candle?" I knew the pain in her heart because it was in mine as well. "Your Daddy will light the candle and we will all weep. We will remember Papa and Grandma Belle and all the ones we love who are no longer with us and we will weep. However, we will not grieve like those who have no hope. We will light the candle and we will remember why Jesus came."

Don't Let Your Goals Be a Stumbling Block

I don't remember the exact words she used but I understood what she was asking. She was one of the callers on a radio program I listen to and the question she asked had to do with her and her husband of three months making plans about how they would serve God together. The response to her question was rich with wisdom. "You are young and you do not yet know the challenges you will face. It is good to have goals of what you want to do for God but don't let them become stumbling blocks if your life doesn't turn out the way you planed for it to turn out." I'm not sure if these were his exact words either but they are what I heard.

I remember the goals I had as a young woman leaving home for the first time. I dreamed of serving  God in dramatic ways. The truth is if I had been the author of my own story it would look far different than it does today. Looking back now I wonder if I was seeking to bring God glory or wanting my own glory by seeking God?

"You are young and you do not yet know the challenges you will face. It is good to have goals of what you want to do for God but don't let them become stumbling blocks if your life doesn't turn out the way you planed for it to turn out." I had no idea when I was a young woman what the challenges were that I would face. If I had placed my faith in myself or my goals I would have been crushed long ago.

What I have found throughout these years of longing to serve God is that it is both a humbling and a purifying pursuit. The challenges I have faced have been like a refining fire exposing my prideful heart and desperate need of a Savior. The role that God has given me has not been that of being the author of this story but of trusting the one who is.

Lord Jesus, I am fixing my eyes on You. You alone are the author and perfecter of my faith. I lay on Your alter all my ambitions, hopes and dreams.

A Cure For Drudgery

I've been decorating for Christmas. I do it partly for my grandchildren because when I put the angels on the mantle and string the lights on the porch it builds a since of anticipation. But I don't just do it for them I do it for myself as well. I can get locked into the drudgery of life and only see the day in day out work that is before me. Christmas reminds me that I'm part of a bigger story.

"I am Gabriel.  I stand in the presence of God, and I was sent to speak to you and to bring you this good news." (Luke 1:19) This is part of the wonder of Christmas, this intersection of what happens in the presence of God and here on earth. Gabriel was sent from God's presents to tell Zechariah that the four hundred year of silence was over. What was the good news he brought? Zechariah's prayers had been heard and his wife was going to have a baby. This child would be filled with the spirit of Elijah and make ready for the Lord a people prepared.

Next Gabriel was sent from God presence to a city of Galilee named Nazareth. I have now been to Israel twice and both times the tour guide didn't think Nazareth was significant enough to stop the bus. It may not be significant enough to stop a tour bus but God choose Nazareth as the place where Gabriel would greet Mary with the news that she had been chosen to be overshadowed by the Most High by the Holy Spirit and that she would conceive a child.

The lights I have on my porch come on automatically. They remind me that Jesus was born at night. I can just imagine the shepherds keeping watch over their flock by night, trying to stay awake and maybe wishing they were home in bed. In this ordinary setting to these very ordinary people an angel of the Lord appeared and the glory of the Lord shown around them. Then came the message that the fullness of time had arrived, a Savior, who is Christ the Lord had been born! "And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying, 'Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace among those with whom he is pleased!'"(Luke 2:13)

Father, I am filled with wonder at the message the angels brought on the first advent. But I am filled with anticipation with what the angel said at the Resurrection. "Men of Galilee, why do you stand looking into heaven? This Jesus. who was taken up from you into heaven, will come in the same way as you saw him go into heaven." (Acts 1:11) It's been almost two thousand years since the angels said these words but that doesn't diminish my anticipation it increases it.

He called me by name

Growing up in a big family I knew that if someone was looking at me they were probably talking to me even if they called me by the wrong name. I've experienced talking to people who weren't sure how to address me so they didn't use my name. But I also remember when Steve looked into my eyes and spoke the words before a church filled with people, "I Steve take you Sarah to be my wife." He called me by name.

I was reminded of this yesterday when we read the passage, "Fear not, for I redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine." (Isaiah 43:1) In my relationship with God I am more than just one of His creations. I am not simply lost in the sea of humanity  He called me by name.

I live on a cattle farm. When herding the cows shock sticks are used but when a shepherd is herding his sheep he calls them by name. When Jesus described the kind of shepherd He was He said, "The sheep hear his voice, and he calls his own sheep by name and leads them." (John 10:3) This is such a comfort He not only calls me by name but he also leads me.

Sometimes I feel lost. I'm not sure where I am much less where I'm supposed to be going. When I feel insecure and unsure of who I am or where I'm going I remind myself that my security rests in the fact that I have a good shepherd. A good shepherd who not only leads me but also gives me abundant life. I don't have to be afraid He doesn't just lead me He also calls me by name.

Dealing With What Has Been Left Behind

This has to be the hardest job I've ever been given. I am going through the house Papa built and packing things up. Papa died the week after Ma Belle and now it's time to deal with things left behind. The family went through and made lists of things they would like and this is very helpful.

Each list is touching because the things that are being asked for don't have great monetary value but instead are reminders of the life that was shared with the ones who once owned them. My ten year old grandson's list, however, is the most touching of all. He wrote, "I want Papa's brown shoes because they were the ones he wore the most and he touched them all the time. I want one of Papa's hats because he wore it. I want Grandma's mirror because she looked in it and I remember helping her with her hair. I want the ceramic brown cow with the broken tail because I used to give Grandma Belle flowers to put in it. Finally, I want Grandma's humming bird on the gold wire that always sat on the dining room table because it's beautiful and it reminds me of her."

This job has caused me to think about the things I will leave behind because the truth is we take nothing with us not even our bodies. What will my children and grandchildren choose to remind them of me. As I am working my way through Ma Belle and Papa's home room by room I am finding in each nook and cranny evidence of a couple who loved the Lord and each other.

"Foxes have holes, and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has nowhere to lay his head."(Luke 9:58) So what did Jesus leave behind? "These things I have spoken to you while I am still with you. But the Helper, the Holy Sprint  whom the Father will send in my name  he will teach you all things and bring to your remembrance all that I have said to you." (John 14:25-26) Jesus didn't leave things to remind us of Him, He sent His Spirit to dwell in us.

Lord Jesus, as I box up the things that have been left behind I pause to thank You that You gave me Your Holy Spirit to comfort, counsel and teach. I also thank You because You have also given me the promise of Resurrection so that I do not grieve like those who have no hope.

Hidden In Plain View

"Now children remember these decorations are to be hidden in plain view." These are not only a Christmas decoration but a game we play each year. I have twelve small reindeer and snowmen that the children are to hide but they are to hide them by making them part of the decorations. Whoever finds one of these reindeer or snowmen then has to find another hiding place where it will be in plain view. Right now I have a snowman riding the camel in my nativity scene and a reindeer hanging from my dining room chandelier.

"I love those who love me, and those who seek me diligently find me." (Proverbs 8:17) I see this through out the Scriptures as an invitation to seek and an invitation to find. "If you call out for insight and raise your voice for understanding, if you seek it like silver and search for it as for hidden treasures,then you will understand the fear of the LORD and find the knowledge of God."(Proverbs 2:3-5)

There is something about the process of first discovering a longing and a thirst for something that helps me appreciate it's value.  What I see in these verses is that there is treasure that I am invited not just to seek but to find. God placed a yearning in my heart for Him and desire to find Him.

This imagery of seeking and finding is in the New Testament as well. When Jesus tells us what the Kingdom of Heaven is like He says, "The Kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field." (Matthew 13:44) "Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls." (Matthew 13:45) In all these verses I see an invitation with a promise of finding the thing I am longing for.

Father, thank You for giving me this desire to seek for You. Thank You for not only giving the desire to seek but also the delight of finding both You and Your Kingdom.

A Quiet Moment

It takes time for the stillness to seep into my soul. Sunday I slipped away to a quiet place and watched as one by one the leaves fell. To say the leaves fell is to brief a description. I could not feel the breath of the wind but I watched as the leaves gently danced their way to earth. The stillness of the scene was not broken as each leaf was gently received to earth in unbroken silence.

"Be still and know that I am God." ( Psalm 46:10) This was the verse I thought of as I sat there in silence. But it was hard to be still when one by one the troubling events of the week came rushing to my mind. Somehow the quietness of the moment had allowed all the things I'd been trying not to think about to come to the surface.

When I looked this verse up in "Bares' Notes on the Bible" I found that the Hebrew words be still means to properly cast down, to let fall; to let hang down; then to be relaxed. It expresses the attitude of leaving matters with God and not being anxious about the issue. So as I watched the trees around me releasing the leaves that the fluttered to the ground I began to relax and let go of the troubles I had brought with me.

When I find a solitary place to be still I look around me at all the evidence that God is at work. I look around me and everywhere I look I see His finger prints. I see the silhouette of the tree whose last leaf has silently found it's way to earth. Now the tree looks as if it is raising it's arms in praise. Finally, I find both stillness and praise entering my soul as well.

Father, help me to carry this quiet moment back into my busy world.

Grandmother Embraced Life!

Usually, I had to share her with my eight siblings but for one glorious year I had her almost all to myself. Grandmother opened up worlds for me. In her backyard she had a wildflower garden, she would show me the different flowers as if they were her friends. Outside the breakfast room window she had a bird feeder. She knew the birds not only by name but by their songs. One time there was a comet passing in the heavens and Grandmother bundled up several of her grandchildren and took us to a bluff where we would be able to see it best. Grandmother embraced life!

With the same passion Grandmother embraced life she embraced God. I would tiptoe into her room in the morning hungry for breakfast and there she was on her knees talking to God. Often she would be praying out loud and I would kneel beside her and join in. Grandmother prayed fervently for all her grandchildren.  My Aunt Sally was a missionary in Brazil and Grandmother prayed about every one Aunt Sally mentioned in her letters.

While I was with Grandmother that year she was preparing her home for when Aunt Sally and her family would be coming home on furlough. Grandmother was so excited because at last she was going to get to meet her grandchildren from Brazil for the first time. I was so jealous! Because talking to God at Grandmother's house was such a natural thing to do I began to talk to Him about my jealousy. My prayer became a request that God would take away my jealousy and replace it with love. I asked God to give me a special love for my cousins.

God did for me exactly what He promised He would do. "This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know he hears us -- whatever we ask -- we know we have what we asked of him." (1 John 5:14-15) Grandmother died about five years later but the special love God gave me for my cousins has continued and now has been extended to their children as well.

Father, thank You for giving a grandmother who taught me to embrace life. Thank You for teaching me through her that I could embrace You and be embraced by you. Thank You for enriching my world by the people You have given me to love. And, oh yes, thank You for teaching me the cure for jealousy.

The Orbit

The path taken by one object as it circles around another object is called an orbit. I have orbited around many things. Sometimes I have been held in the orbit of guilt as my mind has rehearsed again and again my faults and failures. Other times I have been held in the orbit of anger and resentment as the faults and failures of others held me in it's gravitational pull. Being trapped in the orbit of either guilt or anger is a miserable place but I have a secret weapon.

When I wake in the night orbiting around and around faults and failures there is only one thing that break the gravitational pull. "At midnight I rise to praise you"(Psalm 119:62) When I turn my heart and mind towards God I am drawn into His light and love. Praising God and focusing who He is sets me free.

"About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns of praise to God, and the prisoners were listening to them, and suddenly there was a great earthquake, so that the foundations of the prison were shaken. And immediately all the doors were opened, and every one's bonds were unfastened." (Acts 16:25,26) Praise and thanksgiving is so powerful that not only does it set me free from the negative orbit but it can have an effect on all those around me as well. 

Orbiting around faults and failures either mine or others always produces sorrow.  I am so grateful that I have been set free, ransomed, from the negative gravitational pull of this orbit. Orbiting around the Jesus Christ with songs of praise and thanksgiving I have obtained joy and gladness, and sorrow and sighing have fled away.

The Blessing

My granddad was the strongest man that ever lived and he loved me. I loved him too. I loved everything about him, his Italian accent, the way he could grow garlic in the garden and the way he said my name "Sadah."

It made me so sad when he had a stroke. After his stroke he couldn't walk anymore so I would sit  by his wheelchair and keep him company. He would tell me stories of his childhood, what it was like to grow up in Italy. He told me about tending to sheep. Though he was confined to a wheelchair through his stories we traveled back to days of his youth.

Granddad never got tired of hearing me read the gospels. He would say,"Sadah, I lika all the Bible but read to me again about Jesus." My granddad was a strong independent man and it was hard for him when he loss the use of his legs. One day I found a picture in his house of Jesus holding a lamb. "Granddad, when you were younger you were like the sheep in this picture who are running all over the field. But now your like the lamb that Jesus carries." From then on Granddad kept that picture where he could see it.

Granddad gave me a special gift. Every night as I would climb the stairs to go to bed he would call out, "Sadah, Goda blessa youra good heart!" It's been many years since I was a young girl climbing those stairs. In fact I am now have grandchildren of my own but sometimes as I'm falling asleep I can still hear my granddad calling out his blessing.

Lord Jesus, thank You for the blessings You have placed in my life.

The Magnitude of the Situation

My oldest brother was a master of big words my little brother loved attention it was the perfect combination for what took place. Nick began to work with Cessna teaching him to form words that were far beyond his ability to understand. Finally, he was ready. His timing couldn't have been better, he turned to the adult who addressed him and with his toddler's tongue he proclaimed, "You cannot fully comprehend the magnitude of the situation."

What is the magnitude of my situation? This year has brought with it so many challenges. If I wasn't looking at life through the lens of faith I think the magnitude of the situation would overwhelm me. My faith isn't in myself and it isn't in the belief that everything is going to be alright. My faith doesn't keep me experiencing the storm that rages all around me. But by faith I can see a greater story being told than just the chapter I am experiencing now.

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor powers, neither heights nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8: 38,39) It is in the magnitude of God's promise that I have put my faith.

Faith is being sure of what I hope for and confident about what I don't see. What I do see is scary. I see broken hurting people but through eyes of faith I also see a Redeemer. Long ago I put my confidence in the one who said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."(Hebrews 13:5) Absolute magnitude is a measure of the intrinsic luminosity of a celestial body. The absolute magnitude of God's grace and glory can only be seen through eyes of faith.

Heavenly Father, I am overwhelmed by the greatness of Your love and Your peace that passes understanding. Your love is far beyond my comprehension. Though I do not fully understand the situations I find myself in I know that I am not alone and that nothing can separate me from Your love.

There is a Goat in the Middle of the Highway

I don't want to be late. I don't want to be early. I just want to be on time, but there is a goat in the middle of the highway. This goat has a name, her name is Sugar. She's is a LaMancha goat. This means Sugar has no ears. Sugar has no horns. Sugar has no handle for me to grab her by. I live on a farm but I'm not really a farmer. All I want to do is get to my appointment on time, but there is a goat in the middle of the highway.

I park my car, I have no idea what I'm supposed to do but I can't pretend I don't notice this goat named Sugar in the highway. This was not part of my plans for today. I'm now standing next to the goat and I'm talking out load but not to the goat. "Father, what am supposed to about this! You know I don't know how to do this sort of thing! This goat has no handle!" I think I'm kind of screaming the prayer as the cars and trucks whiz by.

I guess goats don't understand English because I'm telling her where she needs to go to be safe but she keeps going in the opposite direction. I've been chasing that goat for thirty minutes and now I have to call and explain why I'm not going to be there for my appointment. The phone is pressed to my ear by my shoulder because I'm holding a tree branch in each hand. Suddenly, I have an idea I let the phone drop and grab my good silk scarf from around my neck and tie it around Sugar's neck. At last I can  lead  drag Sugar to safety.

Now, I'm sitting in my car just thinking about what just happened. It's as if I've been given a picture of what this past week was like. I made plans of what I would do but they didn't happen because I'm not really the one who is in control. Not only that but sometimes I'm just like Sugar standing the middle of harms way but not trusting the one who wants to lead me to safety.

Heavenly Father, Your word says to, "Trust in the LORD with all you heart and do not lean on your own understanding." (Proverbs 3:5) That is so hard to do. Please help me to humble myself and believe that You are LORD. When You allow things in my life that I am not expecting please help me trust You.

It is a Mystery

It is a mystery and because it is a mystery I cannot fully understand or explain it. Yet, I am content to live with mystery, to believe in a God that is beyond my ability to completely explain. If I could fully understand the ways of God I would be His equal, I am not. One of the mysteries is this, He has allowed me to be a participant in His plans through prayer.

There are many places I see this in Scripture but the one I find most intriguing is in Daniel. Daniel was a man who was faithful in prayer. In the tenth chapter of Daniel he tells about a time he was fasting and mourning and seeking to understand the word God had revealed to him. In response to Daniel's prayer God sent an angel. This is what the angle said; "Fear not, Daniel, for from the first day that you set your heart understand and humble yourself before your God, your words have been heard, and I have come because of your words. The prince of the kingdom of Persia withstood me twenty-one days, but Michael, one of the chief princes, came to help me, for I was left there with the kings of Persia, and came to make you understand what is to happen to your people in the latter days." (Daniel 10:12-14)

Is there a parallel picture in the New Testament? Yes. "For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places." (Ephesians 6:12) We are to enter into the this mystery the same way Daniel did, "Praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication." (Ephesians 6:17-18)

But I have to ask myself am I really doing this? Am I really entering into what God is doing by praying at all times in the Spirit, with all prayer and supplication or am I simply existing in the moment? Jesus' admonition to His followers was to watch and pray. However, I am aware that I often simply watch the events around me unfold without entering into to the mystery of God by prayer.

Heavenly Father forgive me for the lack of faith that keeps me from prayer. You have given the command to not only watch what You are doing in my generation but to pray. Your word teaches that the prayer of a righteous person has great power. Please grant me the grace to enter into this mystery of prayer.

Seasons Change

My friend and I were hiking in the North Georgia Mountains this week. We have been friends for over thirty years and for over thirty years we have come to these mountains to hike. Year after year we have watched the seasons change. We have grown to appreciate the beauty of each season. Each year we try to go on a hike to celebrate our birthday's mine is the first day of Spring and hers is in the Autumn.

Each season has it's own particular beauty, each season also has it's own difficulties. Our conversation encompasses both of these. We don't walk as fast as we used to and it's not only because we are getting older. We take more time to stop and admire the way the Sun shines through the leaves as we look up through the branches. We admire the soaring birds and appreciate the view from the North Rim of the canyon.

We have walked together long enough to have many shared memories. At one time we hiked while caring our baby's in backpacks. When our children were young we were constantly tiring to point out the glories of the canyon. They, however, were to busy marveling at the rocks and the insects they were discovering to see the bigger picture.

This year our conversation was about the season of life we were in. Because I was talking to my friend I was able to be honest and say this has been a hard year. Yet, I'm not willing to say it's been a bad year any more than I'd be willing to say there is a bad season. My mind keeps going back to Ecclesiastes where it says "For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven." I think the key to understanding that everything is beautiful in its time is the fact that God has placed eternity into man's hearts.


Heavenly Father, Your word tells me that, "All are from dust, and to dust we return." (Ecclesiastes 3:20) As the seasons come and go I am aware of the passing of time yet You have placed eternity in my heart. Thank You so much for loving me and sending Your Son into this world so that by believing in Him I have eternal life.

A Backdrop for His Glory

"Don't cry," he said.  I knew he wanted to bring comfort but I also knew my daughter needed to cry. Crying was the right response that night. We were gathered around the bedside of someone we loved watching her draw her finale labored breaths. The tears flowed the pain was real and yet we were all searching for where faith and grief intersect.

In times like this prayers are not elaborate. Martha and Mary were watching their brother die. It was a painful vigil. "So the sisters sent word to Jesus, 'Lord, the one you love is sick.'" (John 11:3) When the pain is deep the words are few. Jesus heard, he understood the grief they were experiencing but he didn't come right away. He had chosen to paint the glory of the Resurrection on the canvas of their life. 

Suffering the death of someone you love is a very confusing. When grief comes it is like a cloudy day, you know the Sun is shining even though you can't see it or feel it's warmth. I see this when I read about Jesus' encounter with Martha after her brother's death. She still believed she just didn't understand. Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?"(John 11) She really did believe but when they got to the tomb and Jesus said to take the stone away she warned him that after four days the dead body would stink.

Jesus didn't condemn the deep emotional response that death brought in fact, "Jesus wept." This reminds me of the of what it said in Isaiah 53 when it describes Jesus as, "a man of sorrows, acquainted with grief." Jesus identified with their pain. He heard them when they told him that their brother was sick. It was on this dark canvass of human suffering that he chose to display the truth of the Resurrection.

Lord Jesus, thank You for hearing my prayers even when my prayer is a simple telling of what I am experiencing. Thank You for understanding my confusion, and please, take my messy life and let is be a backdrop for Your glory.

When Kingdoms Collide

"My kingdom is not of this world." (John 18:36) A kingdom that is not of this world? Can you imagine how that sounded to Pilate as Jesus stood before him bound and bloody from a night spent in the court of the high priest? John the Baptist had declared, "Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand."(Matthew 3:2) For this kingdom and this king John was willing to die and he did. Pilate, however, when presented with the a truth of the kingdom of heaven washed his hands of it.

"To you it has been given to know the mysteries of the kingdom of heaven, but to them it has not been given." (Matthew 13: 11) Jesus proclaimed the kingdom, He spoke about it in parables and what had been prophesied came to pass, "I will open my mouth in parables; I will utter what has been hidden since the foundation of the world."(Matthew 13:35, Psalm 78:2) So the the King spoke of His Kingdom but not everyone who heard the words understood. There was a problem, "For this people's heart has grown dull, and with their ears they could barely hear, and their eyes they have closed."(Matthew 13:15) The ones who couldn't hear Jesus had not heard John when he cried, "Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand."

Jesus taught us to pray, " Your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven." ( Matthew 6:10) I was thinking about this prayer in connection with Paul praying constantly for the Colossians that they would be filled with the knowledge of God's will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, "so as to walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, fully pleasing to him, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God."(Colossians 1:3) Why should their life look any different from the lives of those around them? It was because, "He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us from the kingdom of his beloved Son." (Colossians 1:13) If we have been delivered from the kingdom of darkness and we are now saints in light then we should shine as lights in the world. When I pray that God's kingdom comes and His will is done this is part of what I am asking for.

When I read the Scripture I see that what I believe about the kingdom of heaven should make a difference in how I live. When Jesus taught the mysteries of the kingdom of heaven the people whose hearts had grown dull were unable to hear and understand what he was saying. In Colossians Paul tells those who have accepted Christ as their king to put to death whatever belongs to their earthy nature. What I see is that as I grow in a deeper knowledge of the king and His kingdom I should represent Him more clearly to the world around me.

Father, let your kingdom come and your will be done on earth as in in heaven.

He Can Come Riding on the Wind or Walking on the Water

Storms come in nature and in life though this is not an uncommon thing they often take us by surprise and hold us hostage by their power. Storms are often accompanied by darkness and strong winds that show me clearly that I am not the one in control. "By now it was dark, and Jesus had not yet joined them. A strong wind was blowing and the waves grew rough. He saw the disciples straining at the oars, because the wind was against them."(Matthew 14:23-27) It was in the midst of this storm that Jesus came to them walking on the water.

Sometimes God uses the storms in my life to humble me but with the humbling comes a deeper since of awe and wonder at who He is and the beauty of His power. This takes away the sting of fear and enables me to come to him not in my own power but by the power of His invitation. "'Lord, if it's you,' Peter replied, 'tell me to come to you on the water.' "Come," he said." The storms in my life allow me to see more clearly who this God is that I worship. They allow me to cast off my high view of myself and enter into to an awe filled since of worship.

One of my favorite hymns was written by a man who lived a very stormy life. His name was William Cowper. His life was filled with mental anguish, which included an eighteen month stay in an insane asylum and several attempted suicides. While he was in the asylum he began reading the Bible and as a result he humbled himself and accepted Jesus as his Savior. This was a man who knew what it was to struggle in the darkness sometimes becoming overwhelmed by the winds of deep depression. However,  just as Jesus chose Peter to walk on the water God chose William Cowper to give us the words of the hymn "God moves in a Mysterious Way."

God moves in a mysterious way
His wonders to perform;
He plants His footsteps in the sea,
And rides upon the storm.

Deep in unfathomalbe mines
Of never failing skill
He treasures up His bright designs
And works His sovereign will.

Ye fearful saints, fresh courage take;
The clouds ye so much dread
Are big with mercy and shall break
In blessings on your head.

Judge not the Lord by feeble sense,
But trust Him for His grace;
Behind a frowning providence
He hides a smiling face.

His purposes will ripen fast,
Unfolding every hour;
The bud may have a bitter taste,
But sweet will be the flower.

Blind unbelief is sure to err
And scan His work in vain;
God is His own interpreter,
And He will make it plain.

And so Lord, I am aware of the darkness, I feel the wind and the rain but I also hear Your voice saying, "Come!" Because You are Lord of storm as well as Lord of my life I choose to come.

The Story Behind the Fading Pictures

There are boxes filled with pictures all over my Living Room floor. As I look through these pictures I am aware that most of the people I'm looking at are no longer alive yet when the pictures was taken they were young and vivacious. I think that's why I woke up this morning thinking about these verses; "A voice says,'Cry!' And I said, 'What shall I cry?' All flesh is grass, and all beauty is like the flower of the field. The grass withers, the flower fades when the breath of the LORD blows on it; surely the people are grass. The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God will stand forever." Isaiah 40:6-8

I have counted at least seven places in the Scriptures where it talks about a man's life being like a fleeting shadow or a mere phantom as he goes to and fro and yet in these same passages I often find God offering comfort. The comfort is found in the contrast between who we are and who God is. In the same chapter of the Bible that I quoted above I find this description of God; "Have you not known? Have you not heard? The LORD is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He does not faint or grow weary; and His understanding is unsearchable."

There is another picture that has always filled me with wonder. This same everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth whose understanding is unsearchable is spoken of in Ephesians. In Ephesians I see a picture of something that took place before the foundation of the world. "Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved." (Ephesians 1:3-6)

These pictures of people whom I have loved remind me of how fleeting life is. Their life here on earth is now a memory, very much like the flowers that were blooming in my yard yesterday before the frost came last night. However, the word of God that remains forever shows me a much bigger picture. "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life." (John 3:16) When Ma Belle was alive she told me that the only thing she wanted said at her funeral was the message of eternal life. And so these pictures that fill my Living Room remind me not only of the brevity of life but also of the eternal life promised in God's word to those who believe.

Father, I have been reminded so much lately that I my life here on earth is temporary and yet I am filled with hope when I read in Your Word about the love You have lavished on me. I grieve for those I can now only see in photographs but I don't grieve like those who have no hope because I believe in the eternal life given through faith in Your Son.

Release

I don't remember exactly when my fingers went numb but I kept hoping that if I ignored the problem it would go away. I was wrong. I began not only having numbness but difficulty using my hands particularly my right hand. Then the pain came, waking me up at night. Finally, I went to the doctor and he explained that the median nerve going through the carpal tunnel in my wrist was being compressed. He said it would require surgery where he would cut into the ligament that was pressing on the nerve. He said if I left it untreated the nerve could be permanently damaged, causing weakness, numbness, and tingling. His last words to me where, "I recommend you have release surgery."

"See to it that no one fails to obtain the grace of God; that no "root of bitterness" springs up and causes trouble, and by it many become defiled." ( Hebrew 12:15) Bitterness in my spiritual life is like the ligament that is pressing on the nerve leading to my hand because bitterness can cause me to fail to receive God's grace. Without God's grace flowing freely in my life I'm as useless as a hand in pain that doesn't work.

I had the surgery done a couple of weeks ago. I was unable to cut through my own wrist and then cut through the tendon to release the nerve. However, I did participate. First, I admitted I had a problem. Then I submitted to the surgery it was done while I was awake. I did not get off the table but stayed there while the surgeon released my nerve.

I find regularly in my Spiritual life that roots of bitterness have begun to get a strangle hold on different areas of my life. I don't always deal with them right away I really want them to just go away. But when the pain and weakness gets to the place where I can't ignore it anymore I come to the Great Physician for help. My responsibility is to humble myself and accept the discipline He chooses to bring so that I can be healed.

Oh Heavenly Father, You are the Great Physician I humbly come to You today and ask that you would examine my heart and show me where bitterness has gained a strangle hold. I submit myself to Your discipline so that I can know full release.

When He Calls Your Name

I was tucking my grandchildren into bed. I could tell they were tiered by their big yawns and the way they were rubbing their eyes. As I got ready to pray for them I told them about when Samuel was a little boy lying down in the temple of the Lord where the ark of God was. I told them how God had called his name but because he didn't yet know the Lord and because the word of the Lord hadn't been revealed to him yet he didn't know who was calling him. Then I prayed that God would call their names and that they would know Him and that God would reveal His word to them.

Have you ever heard God call your name? Someone shyly told me this Summer that he had heard God call his name. I think that he was afraid of how I would respond. He had been pursuing God and longing for a deeper relationship. I wasn't surprised nor did I think it strange that God had called his name. The question I asked him was ,"Well, how did you respond?"

Samuel, however, wasn't pursuing God when he heard his name called. The Scripture says that he didn't yet know the Lord. The message God gave this young man was a hard one. Eli told Samuel to say, "Speak, for your servant hears," (Samuel 3:4) but the message God gave Samuel was about how Eli had not been listening to the Lord and how God was going to bring punishment on his house forever. Now that's a heavy message to wake a young man up with in the middle of the night!

"This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know he hears us--whatever we ask--we know that we have what we asked of him." (1 John 5:14-15) With this confidence I lay my hands on the heads of my grandchildren and I ask that God will wake them up by calling them by name. I ask that He will reveal Himself to them through His Word. I also ask that God will take these children and give them the courage to speak the truth.

Lord Jesus, I too want to hear You call my name. Open my ears to hear, my eyes to see and please give me the courage to obey. Let my life be an example to my children and grandchildren of one who hears and obeys Your voice.

The Prince of Darkness vs The Prince of Peace

It may have seemed he was alone but he wasn't. Unseen by human eyes the Prince of Darkness taunted him with questions and accusations that were aimed to cause confusion and doubt. "You were so sure of yourself when you proclaimed to all that you were the voice of one calling in the desert to make straight the way of the Lord. So where is he now? You were making a way for him why doesn't he make a way for you to be released from this dungeon, if he really is the Messiah, the Lamb of God, who takes away the sins of the world? You testified that this Jesus is the Son of God, so why are you in prison?"

He sent to two of his disciples to Jesus with this question, "Are you the one who was to come, or should we expect someone else?"(Luke 7:18-23) He was humble enough to admit he may have made a mistake. Jesus responded by continuing to cure those who were diseased, casting out evil spirits, and giving sight to many who were blind. Then He said to the messengers, "Go back and report to John what you have seen and heard: The blind receive sight, and the lame walk, those who have leprosy are cured, and the deaf hear, the dead are raised, and the good news is preached to the poor. Blessed is the man who does not fall way on account of me."

John could understand the message that Jesus was sending him because John was well verse in Scripture. Jesus was quoting from Isaiah 35. It also says, "Strengthen the weak hands, and make firm feeble knees. Say to those who have an anxious heart, 'Be strong; fear not! Behold, your God. He will come and save you. Then the eyes of the blind shall be opened, and the ears of the deaf unstopped; then the lame man will leap like a deer and the tongue of the mute sing for joy."

Sometimes I feel like John the Baptist and I find myself in situations that don't fit my ideas of how I thought my life as a Christian would be. At times like these I remind myself of what Jesus said the night before He died, "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid." (John 14:27) This peace that I have received by faith in the Prince of Peace silences the voice of the Prince of Darkness. When I put my faith in Him I am sure of what I hope for and confident about what I cannot see. I am blessed because like John the Baptist I have chosen to give my allegiance to the Prince of Peace and I will not fall way on account of him.

Lord Jesus, when I am assaulted by the taunts of the enemy help me to fix my mind on Your words of truth. You words silence both confusion and doubt. Your peace lifts me up and helps me see the bigger picture. It gives me a view of Your Kingdom where You reign. I want You to reign in my life and bring tranquility to my soul so Your kingdom can be seen in me.

"NO! I Don't Want That!"

"No thank you, I don't think I want that." There are lots of qualities in the Scripture that I want but there is one that never appealed to me, never. Every time I read about it there was something in me that would recoil, It reminded me of the story of children who would wake up on Christmas morning and find coal in their Christmas stocking. The coal was a cruel joke NOT a gift!

Coal is black and dirty. However, when coal is subjected to high temperatures and incredible pressure over a very long period of time a diamond is born. The beauty of a diamond is found in it's relationship to light. When light hits a diamond there is a dazzling dance and it refracts that light into all the colors of the rainbow.

Now, I understand better the gift that God has been offering me all these years. The problem is that I have been viewing this gift with my flesh and not the Spirit. When ever I look at this gift through my flesh it appears like a dirty black lump of coal. But because God has given me His Holy Spirit I am now beginning to recognize the diamond instead. I am beginning to understand that what is being offered to me is a gift. Through this gift God can shine His love into my life so that those around me can be bathed in all the colors of the rainbow. The very colors that surround His throne in Heaven. Through this beautiful gift God is inviting me to be part of something that is so much greater than I am. He is inviting me to reflect His glory.

I have been blessed to see God's light reflected in the lives of others as they humbly received this gift from God. I have seen it displayed in a mother, whose eyes have been repeatedly washed by tears, and yet she refused to stop loving  and believing in her child. I was privileged to overhear the words of love spoken by a husband to his wife as she lay dying. He held her hand and willing entered into her suffering by his love and I saw a rainbow.

 Heavenly Father, Your word has taught me that love suffers long and is kind. Your word has taught me that long suffering is a fruit of Your Holy Spirit. You Father, are gracious and full of compassion  slow to anger and great in mercy. I understand now that You have invited me by the power of Your Holy Spirit to represent Your love to a hurting ,broken world through being long suffering. Thank You for being long suffering with me and please, please let my life be more like a diamond than coal and let the rainbow of hope be seen in me through Your light.

For Everything There is a Season

I knew eventually I was going to have to begin the painful process of letting go. I wanted to hold on to things that were familiar, things that carried with them memories of a time that was now over. Sometimes its hard to sort through the things that people leave behind, especially if the people are people you have loved dearly and miss terribly. Yet, the truth is that in order to move forward in life I know I must be willing to accept change.

Seasons bring with them an understanding of change. Time does not stand still and there is a time for every matter under heaven. According to Solomon God has made everything beautiful in its time. But I also believe that if I am to understand the beauty of all things I must also accept that God has placed eternity into the hearts of every man even though I do not understand what God has done from the beginning to the end.

How can I find peace in this ever changing world? In order for me to find peace and stability I find I must anchor my hope in something that doesn't change. "The steadfast love of the LORD never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. "The Lord is my portion," says my soul ,'therefore I will hope in him.'" (Lamentations 3:22-24)

Because the steadfast love of the LORD never ceases and because I believe in the God of eternity who has loved the world so much that He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life, I can accept that there is:
a time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
a time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn and a time to dance;
a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
a time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
a time to keep silent, and a time to speak;
a time to love, and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace. (Ecclesiastes 3:1-8)

O LORD, I believe Your word that everything is beautiful in its time but some seasons are harder that others! Grant me the wisdom to know what season I am in and the courage to do what that season requires.

The Gift That Brought Me to My Knees

A gift, an amazing gift, that opened my world, that opened my heart, that brought me to my knees. This gift came without instructions, so how was I supposed to decipher what each cry meant? I may not have known what to do but at least I knew where to find wisdom. The gift of children taught me to appreciate the gift of prayer.

"People were bringing little children to Jesus to have him touch them," (Mark 10:13) More than anything in the world I wanted to bring my children to Jesus. I wanted Him to touch them, to open their eyes so they they could see the world through eyes of faith. As a mother my highest goal with my little children was to bring them to Jesus my deepest prayer was for Him to touch them.

It doesn't take long for a baby to become a little child and a little child to grow into an independent youth. When my little children became youths they they discovered that I was not Omniscient. At that time in their life I wanted to be all-knowing! I wanted to have a correct answer to all their questions. I wanted to wisely guide them in the decisions they had to make, decsions that would put them on the right path. My children are a gift from God, a gift that makes me want to be more than I am, a gift that brings me to my knees holding them up to Jesus before the throne. Before the throne I ask the One who is Omniscient to guide their steps and to bless them.

The Sun rises and the Sun sets and before I know it my house is very quiet yet in my heart I hear the echo of their voices. Each voice, each memory is a treasure that is mine to keep. My position is no longer that of authority it has now changed to that of counselor. I remind myself daily not to be anxious for these children who carry my heart with them wherever they go, but instead to carry them constantly before the throne of God. I carry each one before the throne of mercy with prayers, with supplications and yes, always, with thanksgiving. I pray with thanksgiving because I know Jesus never turned away the mothers who brought their children to Him.

Oh Father, what an amazing gift You gave me when You gave me children. They have taught me about love in ways that have humbled me and brought me continually to my knees. When they were young I would place my hands on their heads and pray for them but now they have grown and gone. Still I bring my children to You, Lord Jesus, I know Your hands can reach them when mine cannot and I know You hear a mother's prayer for the blessing of her children.

The Answer

There was something I wanted to say but I wasn't sure if I should speak or keep silent. I was in France for my nephew Guillaume's wedding. I wanted to share with Guillaume and Amandine something that had profoundly affected my life and my marriage but I just wasn't sure when or how or if I should do it so I prayed.

"If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him."(James 1:5) Part of my lack of wisdom was that I wasn't sure of my motives, was I just wanting to call attention to my self? I also didn't want to be preachy. The truth is I don't even have the wisdom to understand myself. But I do know a God who has promised to give me the wisdom that I lack and so I prayed.

On the Eve of the wedding I received the answer to my prayer when Guillaume told me he had something he wanted me to say at his wedding. He asked me to read 1 Corinthians 13 it was the same passage I had been praying about sharing with him. Years ago I had memorized this passage in several translations. I began the practice of saying it to myself at different times throughout the day. I felt it was a gift God had given me and I wanted to pass it on to my nephew and his bride.

I know that "All Scripture is God- breathed"(2 Timothy 3:16) and when I stood to speak I could feel the breath of God. So many people are confused about what love is. When I shared that day I shared not only words but how the power of the Holy Sprint through Scripture teaches me what is true corrects me when I am wrong and guides me to do what is right.

Lord Jesus, when I'm confused and I don't know what to do Your word invites me to ask with the promise that You are listening. When I am lacking the ability to love I go to Your word and Your Spirit speaks to me teaching , rebuking, correcting and guiding me.

The Wedding Band

 My grandmother asked me to bring her her wedding band, she had given it to me for safe keeping when she went to the hospital. When I looked for it it was nowhere to be found.  I was a child deeply aware of my need so after I looked everywhere I knew to look I dropped to my knees and prayed.

It was an unsophisticated prayer. It had two elements to it, one, I was aware of my great need and secondly, I believed I was praying to a God who loved me and was able to answer my prayer. I dropped to my knees and cried with all my heart, "Father, help me!" I opened my eyes and there tucked in the folds of my grandmother's comforter was the wedding band.

Many years have past and many prayers have been said since that day long ago. As I grew up my prayers became more mature. There have been seasons in my life when I didn't feel the great urgency to pray. There have been times when things have been going well and I have felt quite capable of navigating my life.

But then that bubble of self sufficiency bursts. I find myself like a child crying out, "Father, help me!" Again I am aware of two basic facts, my great need and that I have a great God who loves me. The answers to my prayers are not always as tangible as when I found my grandmother's wedding band but it is the same peace that invades my heart, mind and soul now as it was when I was a child.

Heavenly Father, thank You that You hear my prayers even if  I don't know exactly the right words to say. Thank You for deciding in advance to adopt me into Your own family through Jesus Christ. Thank You for Your peace that passes all understanding.

The Choice is Mine to Make

I have been going through a season of major to mild irritations, grieving the loss of people who are dear to me, dealing with health issues, facing change, change and more change. Every morning I wake up and make a decisions of how I choose to respond to the challenges of that day. I make my decision before I get out of bed. Before my feet touch the floor I make my declaration, "This is the day the LORD has made I will rejoice and be glad in it."(Psalm 118:24

My decision to rejoice, however, does not eliminate the battle. I have to choose over and over to take every thought captive because if I don't I begin to feel myself becoming captive to negative thoughts. Although I have a freedom that was purchased with the blood of Jesus Christ still I must choose daily to walk in that truth. 

"A man is slave to whatever has mastered him."(2 Peter 2:19) Bombarded by negative thoughts if I allow them to dictate how I respond to the challenges I face then they will be my master. But I don't have to be their slave I can choose to be free from the crippling influence of negative thoughts because of the salvation I have received through faith in Jesus Christ.

The real question is how shall I represent Jesus Christ to a broken world? I am a broken person who lives in a broken world and yet according to 1 Corinthians 3:16 I am also God's temple and God's Spirit lives in me. My spiritual act of worship morning by morning is to offer by body as a living sacrifice choosing each day to rejoice and give thanks in the power of the Holy Spirit taking every thought captive to the obedience of Jesus Christ.

Lord Jesus, because of you I have the choice to rejoice. I choose to rejoice.

Don't Try

Try to be strong and very courageous. Try to give thanks to the Lord. Try to rejoice in the Lord; I will say it again, try. Something is wrong with these sentences. I added a word that I realize I sometimes add without thinking.

When I add the word try to something God's word says do, it gives me the option of success or failure. I can try to be strong and very courageous, but I can't promise anything. I can try to give thanks in the Lord, but I'm not sure I will. I can try to rejoice in the Lord, but let me say it again I'm only trying.

Isn't it only reasonable to add the word try to these verse? Wouldn't it be foolish to "Be strong and very courageous" if you don't know what's coming your way? Shouldn't 1 Thessalonians 5:18 read, "Try to give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." Difficult things happen so wouldn't it be more reasonable to say, "Try to rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say Try!

When I add the word try to these verses what I am saying is that I am relying on my own strength to accomplish these things. However, what I see in the Scripture is, "Not by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit, says the LORD of hosts." ( Zechariah 4:6) How can I be strong and very courageous? How can I give thanks in all circumstances? How can I rejoice in the Lord? I can do these things not because I am trying but because I am trusting in the Spirit of the LORD of hosts!

Father, thank You that with the command You also gave Your Spirit. Thank You for allowing me in my weakness to experience Your Strength. Thank You for Your invitation to rejoice, give thanks and know Your strength and courage, not by trying, but by trusting Your Spirit.

It All depends on Who You Listen To

It was the spirit of intimidation. The Jews had come back from captivity but what faced them was a broken down wall and the remains of what once had been a powerful city. It had been destroyed because of their sin. Now they were trying to rebuild. Sanballat heard about what they were doing and surrounded them with jeering taunts, "What are these feeble Jews doing?... Will they revive the stones out of the heaps of rubbish, burned ones at that?" Tobiah the Ammonite joined in the taunt saying, "Yes, what they are building --if a fox goes up on it he will break down their stone wall."(Nehemiah 4:2,3) The intimidation was to break the people and produce the fear of failure.

It was the spirit of conviction. The Jews had gathered together to hear the Book of the Law of Moses that the LORD had commanded Israel. They not only read it clearly, they priest gave it sense and when the people understood they bowed their heads with their faces to the ground. Their heart were grieved because they understood at last the depth of their sin and they began to grieve. When they at last understood what God's word said they were filled with the fear of the Lord. The spirit of conviction broke their hearts and produced a spirit of worship.

The spirit of intimidation verses the spirit of conviction, one produces the fear of failure the other produces the fear of God. With intimidation comes discouragement with conviction comes courage. Intimidation points out my faults and failure. Conviction points me toward God's holiness. Both produce a form of brokenness.

"For thus says the One who is high and lifted up, who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy: "I dwell in the high and holy place, and also with him who is of a contrite and lowly spirit, to revive the spirit of the lowly, and to revive the heart of the contrite." (Isaiah 57:15) This is what happened when the people were convicted of their sin and the fear of God fell on them and they bowed to worship. The next verse is a verse of encouragement, "Do not be grieved, for the joy of the LORD is your strength."(Nehemiah 8:10) Conviction opens the door to experience repentance  Repentance opens the door for the Savior.

Father, sometimes I hear both the spirit of intimidation and conviction at the same time. Let my fear be the fear of God that brings with it wisdom. Thank you that You dwell with those who have a contrite and lowly spirit. In Your presence their is joy and strength.